Scope of Grief and What to Do

Scope of Grief and What to Do

We grieve all kinds of loss, not just death, but loss of job, career, home, family, friends, a car, a cherished possession, and so forth. Loss of harmony in a relationship or loss of a marriage is incredibly upsetting. Not only this, but everyone that has to do with the situation feels the impact.

We cannot take grieving off like we can take off a jacket and leave it at home. It seems to be stuck with us. Therefore we need to find ways to handle it, so it does not take over and overwhelm us to the point of debilitating hurt. In many cases, especially soon after an intense event, it is normal to find ourselves in tears or in a state of depression, but if we build a strong base  spiritually we can withstand and overcome that which would otherwise seem unbearable.

In the case of a death, moving away from emotional agony actually honors the individual who has passed and who more than likely desires that you will be "all right" and that you "recover." Giving your consent to function normally at right activities, to take care of yourself and others, and to move forward with purpose and joy again -- allowing for these things -- opens the way for recovery.

It was and is important for me to realize that my husband, who passed away ten years ago, desires that I live happy and full days with purpose. Would you not want this for ones you love? I was able to consent to recovery and begin to act more freely in everyday life by holding to this thought. Perhaps if you think about this in your own case, it will help you too. Emotions will run up and down during this process, but it is a stable base to accept and hold to the fact that we wish for happiness and well-being for those we love -- whether here or hereafter -- this truth remains because it is grounded in universal divine Love.

There are times it will be good to be left alone. There are times when screaming into a pillow is good therapy! There are times when forcing yourself to be still, pray, meditate, and calm yourself in silence, is the best. Try to align with the divine, with Spirit and Love, and feel after His direction, feel after His comforting.

These ideas work as well for loss of job, of reputation, of money, home, a friendship -- whatever it is that causes grief or upset.

One should not be alone altogether, however. We need opportunities to share memories and emotions, to share fears and hopes, to be with a positive supportive person -- friend or professional -- but someone who actually cares. Be careful that you confide only in those you feel you can trust and who are naturally positive -- not negative.

Support must continue for a long time. If you are supporting another who has suffered loss, remember to check with that individual over a period of months, and even years. Just the fact that you are there and accessible brings an element of Love that is healing and comforting.

Looks like Nana

Beware of "triggers"

Moving between stages of grief we experience diverse feelings which are impacted by "triggers" in forms of certain places (or types of places), activites, persons, foods, drinks, painting, photos, books, things owned by or associated a lost loved one ... even voice tone, resemblance, or an innocent remark by a stranger.

I remember coming out of an opera some years after my 'nana' passed, and getting into an elevator for the garage. My nana was extremely distictive and extremely loved by me and my big sister. We grew up with her (and our Pop-pop) for the first years of our lives.

There are so many fond memories. Nana was only about 5 feet tall (that's a stretch), while she was about 4 feet wide (slight over-exaggeration) -- but you get the idea. Her wonderful voice tone was rather high and a tad shaky, but in an endearing way. She was always, always, always watching out for me and my sister, and loving us. She made sure there was that huge basket of toys and games in the closet, air in the old bicycle tires when we got big enough to ride, and that all "scraps" would be saved for my sister and me to throw in the air over the white fence to the scavenging sea gulls.

How could I have imaged she would have a clone! There she was (the "trigger") a duplicate of my nana in the elevator of the opera-house. I was flooded with emotion and tears came. What would this lady think if I suddenly hugged her! I resisted, of course ... now it is years later and it still makes me tear. This is normal. It's okay to miss a loved one a lot. Even knowing, as I am certain, that we will see them again some day, it's still hard to bear any barring separation. So, yes, we can be with the individual in our heart and soul -- and yes, this is real and tangible and good -- but it takes some training of thought and emotion coupled with spiritual understanding to achieve the strength and balance of this demonstration.

The Scriptures say that we are to "comfort" one another with the same "comfort" that helps us.

	2Co 1:4	Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God. https://www.blueletterbible.org/search/search.cfm?Criteria=comforted+of+God&t=KJV#s=s_primary_0_1

What is most comforting to me came with a near-death experience decades ago when my nana's sister, Aunt Lil, who had passed away early, met and stopped me as I was moving away from a very traumatic event into pure Spirit. She told me (words aloud in my consciousness) that I had more to do. The next thing I knew, I was waking up in recovery where they told me they had "lost" me for several minutes. So let me reassure you, all feels normal, our loved ones are there, and most of all -- the light and pure radiance of divine Love is present tangibly, ever watching over your experience.

Initial Shock

Coaching Session 1

Initial shock: Loss or Disappointment

1. Close eyes and silently (or out loud) repeat the word, "Peace." Do this for one to five minutes as you can -- go slowly, Peace, peace, peace.

Repeat this few minute meditation several times during the day and as you go to sleep, slowly saying, peace.

Write the word peace somewhere before bed -- simply or detailed/artistic.

• This word, peace, carries the idea that delivers the power of peace, and it BEGINS to    establish itself within you. You will build thought upon this in the next days.
• "Peace I give unto you, not as the world giveth, give I unto you" (John 14:27).
•  Bringing the word peace to consciousness creates a thought that instantly shoots a calming, healing mental medicine to every part of your being. It even influences others in a positive way, even if unspoken. It begins a thought-basis that will be built upon for recovery and balance.

       
2. Do your normal routine -- brushing teeth, washing face, and dressing. Wear your most comfortable clothes and/or pajamas.

3. Try to stay in the presence of a friend or supportive family.

          Divine Love loves you and carries you today and through the night. Rest in His love. "In the night His song shall be with me" (Psalm 42:8). Love sings gently over you to comfort tonight.

When Disasters Strike

Grief Recovery: Online Coach

When disasters strike...

Disappointments met by God-appointments 

The purpose of "Life Recovery" (Christian Grief Coaching) is to help individuals who have suffered loss of loved ones, loss of a career or business, loss of a home, loss of hopes and dreams, to recover peace, positiveness, and purpose in life again.

Life Recovery Coaching provides step-by-step instructions in accord with Biblical principles to restore balance and emotional strength when devastation debilitates.

Online coaching with Dr. Abby Parsons requires only the desire to move forward and reclaim (or gain) one's natural God-given energy, peace, and joy. These on-going sessions remain accessable 24X7 to help, heal, encourage, and support. These God-appointments are yours whenever the Spirit moves you to engage. The opportunity is present in each session for the angels of His presence to come and lift you up.

The warmth of these sessions bring comfort; they activate or escalate your natural spiritual gifts and gently lift you into the power of Love that restores your soul, creating in you an example so needed in the world today where literally millions are seeking comfort.

Each blog "session" is Love-inspired and results from listening prayer; the intent is to reduce the time of grief (the unhealthy kind), and guide in proactive steps that you can take now to get unstuck and move forward secure in God's care. Though disasters strike, spiritual joy and love remain eternal to reclaim and express.

Abby has been comforting and healing people through listening prayer for many years, bringing divinely inspired guidance and the Christly power of the Holy Spirit to those in need.

Begin your online sessions today. They will provide practical steps in moving from grief, anger, depression, or torment, into peace, hope, purpose, spiritual power, and brotherly love.

Abby is also available for private one-on-one coaching -- first session free.


http://www.scripturalstudycenter.org